Look! Gypsies!

Ok, I admit it – I am freak of nature. I’ve always been obsessed with things that I don’t think normal people even ever think about. For instance, I like watching documentaries on cults because the whole idea of someone being able to control a large group of people like that amazes me. Not that I would ever join a cult, or be a cult leader, but I’m just fascinated by it. Also, another example, I got hooked on Sisters Wives – the series about the Polygamist family. Lance was like “Do you want to live that that? Is that why you watch this?” No, Lance, you can’t have another wife.

So, on this same note, I am completely mesmerized, fascinated, obsessed, whatever you want to call it with the Gypsies that live in North Augusta. Let me back up for a minute.

When Lance and I first started looking into moving to Augusta, Lance told me about these so-called Gypsies. He told me all these stories about how the men go off to other cities and rip people off, about how the women walk around in sweat suits with pearls and tons and tons of makeup and hairspray for their teased hair, driving their expensive cars, and their children who look like pageant contestants 24/7. He also told me about their neighborhood where they live where they build these huge houses and put trailers in the back to live in while the demons are leaving their brand new home.

Of course, I didn’t believe Lance.

Until….

We were at Five Guys Burgers and Fries. In comes a whole crowd of women who fit the above description. My jaw dropped and all I could do was stare.

Lance was telling the truth!

To take it a step further, I decided that I wanted to see their neighborhood. We took the 15 minute trip up I-20 to North Augusta, and pulled into their neighborhood. EVERY mansion had a trailer behind it. All the house had large statues of Mary and very gaudy window treatments. It was absolutely stunning to see this.

I later told my coworkers that I drove through their neighborhood, and they told me to never do that again because I would be shot. Regardless of their warning, I’ve driven back through the neighborhood on several other occasions…it’s the thrill man!!!!!!!

Since the first glimpse of the Gypsies, I have learned a lot more about them through word of mouth and my own firsthand experience:

• They “keep it in the family” so unfortunately some of the offspring that you see have deformities and/or are mentally handicapped

• They love Red Lobster, Hobby Lobby, the mall, especially Macy’s, the movies, & sushi. In fact, we go to Miyabi’s every Friday night for Sushi and to get my Gypsy fix. Essentially, the Gypsies are every where that I seem to go when I am out and about. It was meant to be.

• They are not good tippers and of course they always pay with cash.

• They speak their own language, which from what I can tell is just a fast version of English.

• The men are rarely ever with the women. I guess they are too busy scamming people.

• The children seem to be happy, despite the fact that they must be miserable under all the makeup and hairspray. One evening I was at the movies waiting on Lance who standing in line for drinks & popcorn, and 10+ Gypsy children ran out the side door. Apparently they were having a birthday. Every single one of them looked like this except for most are blonde:

I have been politically incorrect thus far. The Gypsies are really known as the “Irish Travelers” and they refer to us as the “Country Folk”. You can’t really find out anything concrete about them on the internet, and you for sure can’t find any pictures of the women. I do however have this one picture of the back of a Gypsy’s head taken at Miyabi’s.

Lance is so good to me – he’s considerate of my fascination with them and always lets me sit so I can stare at them. What a good man.

I want to be brave enough to talk to one or at least get a snapshot of one for my own memories. If I ever do get a chance to do these things, I just might write a book.

Gypsies!!!!